Our first wedding anniversary is coming up, I CANNOT believe it! Time has seriously flown. Our first year of marriage has been crazy. We went to Bora Bora on our dream honeymoon, moved our lives away from all our friends and family to North Carolina, and I started a new job while Madi started a new and super intense graduate school program. It's been a crazy year! So I wanted to share a few things about what I've learned thus far in married life.
1) Moving away from friends and family was hard
But it has made us so much closer and way better at communicating. Some people may be like, well duh you are all each other has (plus Nike). But honestly moving to Durham knowing nothing more than where the University was located and having one friend in the same city was hard. Madi was at school all day every day making new friends, and I was at home with Nike. So basically the whole first month we were here and I wasn't working I was really really angry with him. And lonely. And bored. I've never read so many books in my life. I started wondering, why are we here? Was it really worth this big move for him to go to Duke? God smacked me in the face because it was TOTALLY worth it! I have an amazing job at the best hospital in North Carolina with better hours meaning more time with Madi and Nike. Which was much needed after the last year of seeing each other for ten minutes every twenty four hours when I was on night shift. We actually are involved in our church because we have the time, and I love it!
2) Is being right really worth the fight?
NO. No, it's not. When you are far away from your family and best friends and you get in a fight with your spouse, sure you can call friends or family and talk, but staying angry for long in a one bedroom apartment isn't worth it. One situation in particular, I was all excited to go to the Syracuse game in January at Duke. ESPN would be there and I spent the whole day before making a sign for Matt Jones and it was this big deal. Madi got new assignments added onto his schedule for that coming week and didn't have any other time than the night of the game where he could cram in the extra studying, so we didn't go. I was livid. I watched the game at home and saw everyone having fun and getting on TV and was so pissed that I didn't talk to him for hours. In the end, was I mad that we didn't go to the game due to studying? Yeah. Was it worth not talking to him and being mad? No. Pick your battles.
3) Managing money for two people is hard
Even harder for us because we only have one income. Going from Disney annual passes, splitting the cost of rent, and working two jobs to one job, less of a salary with that one job, and staying at home most weekends was really hard to swallow at first. I'm lucky I have a bomb career and make more than an average anyways, however it was a hard transition. It still is hard. And I will throw a party the day Madi brings home his first big boy paycheck when he's done with school.
4) It gets old when people ask when you're going to have a baby
I get it, I'm baby queen. I love babies. Well most children of all ages. Do I want kids? DUH! Does Madi want kids? YES. Read #3 then ask yourselves, how would a baby fit into this financial scenario? It wouldn't workout the best. And even though we've had eight years of being together, it is nice to have married life alone for a little bit! I promise whether we are blessed with our own kids or not and adopt, we will have kids! Be patient, because I'm trying to be.
Its amazing how much God has shown us to listen to his plan and trust in him. Being a super planner, it is hard for me when things get out of whack, and not working for a whole month was a big example after working two jobs for the last four years. Our first year has been full of lots of laughter, and I can't wait to see where we are next year at this time! On our anniversary weekend, which happens to be Memorial Day weekend this year, we will be taking a trip over to Lake Lure, NC where we rented a cabin that is doggy friendly. I can't wait to see everything over there as I have heard it is gorgeous!
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| Photo Credit to Hippie Love Photography |
- Olivia :)
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